These Are the People in My Neighborhood

Some things that I have observed while walking/driving through my neighborhood:

- A car in front of me with a license plate that says "URCHEEZ". How cool is that!?! I now want one that says "IMCHEEZ". Who thinks of this stuff??

- A woman walking down the street carrying a head of lettuce and a toilet plunger. Hmmm...I can't even begin to imagine what kind of kinky games she was gonna play.

- A man walking around fully dressed, except instead of shorts he was wearing Raiders boxers. Umm, Buddy, you aren't fooling anyone. Yeah, we can all tell they're boxers.

- Another grown man squeezed into a Cub Scout uniform (the blue and gold one) about 10 sizes too small for him, complete with scarf and hat, marching and saluting people as they walk by (I swear I live no where near any type of institution).

- A guy getting a blowjob from a girl. Standing on the sidewalk. In a residential area. I had to drive by twice to make sure I wasn't seeing anything!