CL Teaches Mel to Waste Time

Thanks to CL, I have a new fun way to wast time! Googlism is my new favorite thing! So I am totally biting off "the Face" (ewww...that sounds very cannibalistic! Is that a word?). But here is what I get when I looked up my names. First my full first name and then my nickname. But can you believe that they have never heard of Mel Mega? WTF? Have these people been living under a rock? Geesh! What's a girl gotta do to get recognized! Here you go!

melanee is a native of southern california (I live here, but from NoCal)
melanee is organizing shuttle services (To where? The moon?)
melanee is married to paul (I must’ve been really drunk in Vegas!)
melanee is a third (A third of what? Regular human size?)
melanee is a perfect example of why other countries think of americans as ignorant and stupid
(I am rather offended and it’s not true! Stupid foreigners!)
melanee is fabulous (Duh!)
melanee is our newest access amateur babe (How does one become a professional?)
melanee is the real deal (I TOLD YOU!!)

mel is top dog at crufts (WTF?)
mel is "what women want" (Oh yeah, baby!)
mel is invading our space (Sorry, I am taking over the universe)
mel is here (No I’m not)
mel is not a smurf (Then how do you explain my blue skin???)
mel is stupid (Shut up!)
mel is protecting me (Because I am so menacing, of course)
mel is a freak now (Now!?!?)
mel is the queen (I TOLD YOU!!!)
mel is always cheerful (HA! That is funny!)
mel is still 21 (I TOLD YOU!!!!)
mel is worth the wait (I TOLD YOU!! You guys never listen to me!)
mel is going to fail this test (I knew I was a failure)
mel is swell (My new campaign motto)
mel is a goofball (Duh!)
mel is pick of the crop
mel is ready to hit the road (You have no idea)
mel is to make sure this kind of scandal never gets reported (Yeah right! Just tell Mel!)
mel is approx 8 (Inches? Feet? Years?)
mel is a powerful research tool now accessible to all michigan residents anytime and anywhere there is an internet connection (Do I get travel expenses?)
mel is ready to go (Always)
mel is the place for you (See above)
mel is michigan's e (E? As in Ecstasy? WTF is going on in Michigan!?!?)
mel is partially deaf and not happy about it (Hell no! I enjoy my hearing!)
mel is female (Thank god! I’m not a smurf and I am a female. Whew!)
mel is in great demand (I guess everyone heard I was the place to be!)
mel is married to the former eulada paysour (Paysour? That sounds dirty)
mel is always this happy (Not really)
mel is enraged by the british (I swear this is untrue! I love the British and all their British qualities!)
mel is still walking and thinking (Thank god!)
mel is five years old (Sometimes, yeah)
mel is benjamin martin (WHAT!?!? Who the hell am I?)
mel is the hero of the hour ( I TOLD YOU!!!!)
mel is a $350 (What???)
mel is number 13 (I could never live up to CL! She will always be at least 4 ahead of me)
mel is one of three permanent residents and currently one foster iguana who we share our home with (Can we do something about the bathroom?)
mel is easy to understand for me (Glad someone does)
mel is whompin' the $# (THAT’S RIGHT, BIATCH!!)
mel is not for eating (Please disregard this statement. It is absolutely NOT TRUE!)
mel is a state of the art "robotic steed (Ummm…okay)
mel is so cool (Duh!)
mel is confused (Only about Michigan)
mel is a pure (girl? Hehehe)
mel is just the wife he needs (Who? Clive Owen? I strongly agree!)